I don't even know where to BEGIN!

So. Or MacBook died, again. I think it's just that time to save up and get a new computer :/ For now, I bum of our awesome neighbors and use their laptop!

I haven't posted in a hot minute. Mainly because of no computer, and because we have been busy!

I feel like I have a ton to post on (and I do), but I'm going to break it up in new posts so I don't have one LONG post!

First things first. I recently just celebrated my first Mother's Day, and man oh man was it awesome! We celebrated the whole weekend! Friday we went to the NC Zoo. It was Hasting's first time, and he did awesome! We took both the stroller and the mei tai carrier. Hasting mainly stayed in the mei tai, but did ride in the stroller a few times. The stroller was more for help in holding the diaper bag, drinks, and gift shop stuff. I know Hasting won't remember the trip, but it was a really fun experience for Chad and I as parents.

We woke up early the next morning and spent the day at Atlantic Beach! It was really nice to have a getaway for the day at the beach! The water was too cold for Hasting to get in, but I dipped his toes in. He did NOT like it, mainly because it was TOO cold. We went our for dinner at a nice restaurant after laying on the beach for the day, and Hasting passed out! We also took Hasting to the sound and got a few pictures there. I have some family in Morehead City that neither Chad nor Hasting have ever meet, so we decided to call and go visit with them. I myself hadn't seen them in over three years. It was such a special moment when my aunt kathy & uncle buddy met Hasting. He loved them! We plan on going back to visit again some this summer!

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No Bake Pumpkin Chocolate Chip Balls

You will need: 3/4 cup quick oats (60g) 1/2 cup oat flour (or make your own by blending oats in a food processor until they become powder. Measure after blending.) (75g) 1/4 tsp salt 1/4 tsp baking soda 1/4 cup xylitol or sugar (or coconut sugar or sucanat) (55g) 1/4 tsp cinnamon (optional: a pinch pumpkin pie spice as well) optional: handful mini chocolate chips 1/3 cup canned pumpkin (or sweet potato puree) (80g) 2 to 2 1/2 tablespoons milk of choice, as needed 1 tablespoon oil (omit if you desire, but I can’t vouch for the results) 1/2 tsp pure vanilla extract Instructions: Combine all dry ingredients and stir very well. In a separate bowl, combine all liquid (including pumpkin). Then stir to combine, and form into balls or cookies. Or put in the fridge to firm up a little before forming cookies.

Plans may Fail, but God doesn't

I have decided to not go in to much depth about the passing of Sadler, but I do want to write about it. Writing is very healing for me. The following blog speaks of infant death, please only read at your discretion. Sadler's tiny body reacted negatively to the surfactant that was administered to him to help with the maturity of his lungs. His vitals were stable, until he was given the first dose of those steroids. The first call to come down to the NICU was terrifying. What's even more terrifying is walking in to the nursing staff and the neonatologist reviving your child. Chest compressions and intubation. Stats dropping to a low, low. Loud noises from machines going off. Sitting there, unable to do anything as your child lays there helpless and lifeless. The hospital chaplain approaches and asks if we would like to pray, and of course being a family of faith we do. We cry, and we pray. We pray, and we cry. I text my best friend, Shannon, and asked that she...

UnSubscribe

It’s been almost 5 months. Yet I still haven’t been able to fully unsubscribe from all the junk emails from all the hideous baby crap. There is SO MUCH. “Buy one get one, one daily only @ Motherhood!” “25% off at Buy BUY baby” “8 weeks postpartum Lindsay” Mama Natural “Today’s the day! It’s Your due date” — enter in the name of of of the one million baby related websites there are these days. Every time, EVERY SINGLE TIME, I go to check my emails, another one squeezes it’s way in. And when that happens, another very-detailed, very sad memory of a moment has an open window. Letters in the mail. Social security cards. Insurance information. Accidental bills mailed to your address showing every procedure and every dime, and every detail of your dead sons expenses. Will it ever stop? Is there a button for “un-subscribe” for all these constant reminders that your baby is dead. Will my phone EVER forget to auto-correct the words Infant loss, N...

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